There were a couple of comments that Emily had sex with Evan, the man she went to see this weekend. I don't know. I'm not sure. I suppose, for those interested, I'll tell you what I know...
So...the evidence...that I'm not sure what to make of...
Friday night, Emily left town at about 3:00 and was supposed to get to Evan's by 7:00, then go to dinner with him and a few of their mutual friends.
Before she left, I told her I had a few expectations for her when she was gone.
"Expectations," she'd asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes, please text me when you get to Evan's so I know you got there okay, and call me at night before you go to bed." I made that request because Emily is notorious for not answering her phone. Try calling her on her cell...good luck getting her.
She agreed. She'd text me at 7:00 when she got there and call me before she went to bed. She also said to text her at 7:00 to remind her to text me. Okay.
So, Friday, 7:00 comes and goes with my text. Nothing from Emily.
Finally, at 8:00 on the nose, I call her. Surprisingly, she answers. Loud noise. Clearly at a bar or loud restaurant. She apologized for not calling. She got lost, just met up with Evan at the place they were eating/meeting, etc.
I could hear Evan and her friends, so they must have been at a table. We talked for a minute. They were doing dinner, a club, maybe another bar.
"I love you," she said. Not softly. Loudly. Loud enough that anyone listening could hear, including Evan. "Talk to you later."
I puttered around the house the rest of the evening. Funny, maybe ironic, but while Em was going to be out of town, with a man, I might add, having fun, she'd left me a list of things to get done-ironing, laundry, changing sheets, cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms.
Yes, very domestic. And yes, it is humiliating to be hand washing your girlfriends panties wondering what the hell she was doing.
By 10:00 I was tired, showered, got ready for bed, slipped into a satin cami and tap panty set, slipped between the sheets, turned on the television, my cell phone cuddled next to me.
I didn't expect to hear from Em until late on Friday, figured I'd go to sleep around midnight and she'd call late, when they got back. And then I wondered when. When they got back and when she went to a guest room and called before she went to bed.
Or late, because she'd go up to his room and they would...well...this made my stomach turn and my groin ache.
I was surprised at midnight, just as I was about to turn out the light, to hear my phone ring and see Emily on my iPhone.
"Hey, I didn't think I'd hear from you so early," I said, half relieved, half disappointed.
Remember, I so fucking confused! Do I fantasize about being cuckolded. Yes. Have I masturbated to the thought? Yes. I've told Em that. But, that doesn't mean I want it to happen. Or do I?
"I know...I'm driving back to Evan's now. We're both tired. We went to one bar after dinner, but I just want to go back to his place and go to sleep."
We chatted as she drove, following him. She asked me what I'd gotten done. Talked about their dinner and friends, etc.
"Well, I'm pulling into his garage now, so I'll call you before I go to bed."
"I...I assume you two want to talk and catch up for a bit, so it will be awhile?" My voice almost cracked. They would want to talk. They might also want to fuck! And I was shaking, but still excited.
"I think we're both tired, so I should be calling back in a few as soon as I crawl into bed." Which meant she wasn't sleeping in his room!!!
"Okay, love you," I said.
Two hours later she called back. Two hours later. "I'm sorry, we got to talking."
"You mean fucking," I thought, though, honestly, I couldn't accuse her of that, not if they really were talking.
Our call was quick; she was tired.
I slept fitfully. I think I was erect all night. I think I was awake most of the night. Angry. Excited. Hurt. Thrilled. I didn't know what to feel. I fantasized about Emily with a man.
I got a good morning text from my lover, but didn't hear from her until later in the day. She and Evan were going golfing. 11:00 tee time. Emily is a late sleeper, so she likely slept until it was time to golf.
Or...I don't know if I want the or...
Remember, I'm trying to figure out, without asking, what, if anything, she did.
I heard from her again at 5:30. She was drunk...or really tipsy, at least. "We had Irish Cream in our coffee, a couple of six packs golfing...I know, I drank too much," she laughed. "I miss you," she cooed.
"I miss you too, Emily. What are you..."
"Evan, stop," Emily laughed, cutting me off. "My boyfriend, silly...want to say to him," she asked Evan.
My blood froze. I had no desire to talk to Evan! Luckily, he had no desire to talk to me. Why would he? He fucked, or wanted to fuck, my girlfriend. Like he wanted to talk to me.
Emily and Evan went to some play that night, dinner. Em texted me from the play, "Play is great, Evan is so nice to do this."
10, 11, 12, 1, 2, 3...I lay in bed watching the clock. 3. 3 in the morning, nothing from Em. I was laying on her side of the bed, wearing on of her negligees. 3 in the fucking morning.
3:30. Ring. "Damn, woman, I didn't think you could stay up this late."
"I know, hon," Emily said in almost a whisper. "I'm sorry, I must have drifted off."
Drifted off. When does a woman drift off? After sex?
"I love you, sweetie," she said, "I'll be home by 4 tomorrow, so I'm leaving at noon."
Another night of fitful sleep. Another night fantasizing about Emily with Evan. Another night dreading the same.
The next morning she called at 1:00. She was just leaving. "Sorry, he wouldn't let me leave. I've been up for awhile, made coffee, then we were just laying there and he got some pictures out of his night stand and was showing me..."
I don't know what she said after that.
Laying there. They were just laying there. In his bed.
I don't know. I don't know if she was teasing me or not. I don't know if I'd rather have her fuck him, complete the fantasy, or if that would be the worst thing in the world.
I don't know.
I don't know.